"NO, i will NOT take a photo with your camera!"

[my-portfolio]

<p>I know I'm very late to this party, but Annie as a large guy (a bit younger, but I have a bear-like physique that usually tells people that I'm not a little kid) I've been asked by plenty of people to take their camera and just get a quick snap though usually when the owner is part of a big group shot. It's annoying but as long as you're not forced to do that with everyone's camera it's something you just grin and bear (after all they're giving you their camera because they think you'll get a good photo).</p>

[mila-g]

<p>Be very busy. If you're busy they wont generally bother you. If you get caught with a free moment take it - take it quickly and take it well. Im surprised anyone suggested taking it badly that would only reflect badly on you. You are the hired help in a service industry - smile and take the cash but dont become a "prima donna" - some Wedding Photography can be "high / fine art" but its not really considered thus by Joe Public.</p>

[bill_from_new_york_city]

<p>I not a wedding photographer. I shoot fashion and when I am in studio doing a photo shoot, sometimes the models, mua, hair stylist are taking photos with their phone cameras and I have been asked to take a photo with their camera, like the model with the MUA photo. To me it not big deal and enforces my idea of teamwork with everyone.</p>

<p>I also believe "Networking Down" and not always networking up. I would have shot the photographed with the mom's camera. Let me put it this way you would have been remember by the mother as the photographer who shot a photo using her camera. Now you are remember by her not in a positive light.</p>

<p>Some of my big breaks are from recommendation from others. Those other were no bodies I meet and treated them respect and/or was helpful to them.</p>

<p>Bill</p>

 

[john bosley photography]

<p>If I could add a different perspective to not being taken seriously because of your age/gender/size? Maybe you look approachable and friendly. Maybe the mother was treating you more like a friend of her daughter instead of a Professional Photographer. Maybe that's a good thing.</p>

<p>I always get told I look young for my age. I don't let it get to me. Instead, I use it as leverage if possible. If I can show respect and be professional in the eyes of someone who's older than me, but they still think I'm a "charming young man" (which I am, by the way... ;) ), what's wrong with that? If I can take good photos <em>and </em> they'd feel comfortable inviting me over for Sunday lunch, what's wrong with that? I'd much rather be "that nice young man" than "that little disrespectful jerk" (not referring to the OP, just an example). I'd rather the guests be comfortable in approaching me than intimidated.</p>

<p>On a side note about customer service, I worked for Home Depot for 6 years and their foundation was customer service. There's a popular story about an elderly woman who tried to return 4 car tires to a Home Depot. Home Depot obviously does not sell car tires, but she was a little confused and insisted that she bought the tires at the store. The store manager was finally called up to explain to the lady why she could not return the tires to the store. Instead, he pulled the money out of the cash register, gave it to her and told her to have a nice day. Why? What was more important to a large company... $100 or a good reputation in the community? I see a photo with a guest's camera the same way. What will ultimately hurt your business and your reputation more?</p>

[david_schilling___chicago_]

<p><em>"To Ted & David's remarks about my karma, etc. I disagree, respectfully...." -Theresa</em><br>

<em></em><br>

I appreciate your "respectful" disagreement but you might want to consider that I've shot over 500 weddings and am probably twice your age. Then review the responses from the other "experienced" shooters above...............</p>

[mt4x4]

<blockquote>

<p>And, Mark, I don't know... it's just, I think my problem is more NOT being taken seriously. You know? Would someone ask a 45 year old male photographer what this woman asked ME?</p>

</blockquote>

<p>Probably.</p>

 

<blockquote>

<p>I will add that the suggestion that you intentionally take a bad photo is repulsive.</p>

</blockquote>

<p>Not to mention, its just a bad idea; period. Would you leave a bad photo in the proof CD? Well, if you intentionally take a bad photo with someones camera you can bet it will be up on Facebook within a week. Do you want your worst (even if intentional) work on the web?</p>

[jtk]

<p>1) Dress professionally, not casually or obviously "comfortably." The B&G aren't casual or comfortable, the parents aren't casual or comfortable, only the most disrespectful of the guests are casual or comfortable. Dress above the situation. Don't dress "like a photographer" because photographers are slobs. It was shocking to see the disrespect slob photographers showed their B&Gs at the last three weddings I've attended...nobody at the weddings dressed as sloppily or casually.</p>

<p>2) Get a professional hairstyle, not a girlish or "fashionable" hairstyle. Change yours totally if you want to be viewed differently.</p>

<p>Life in the fast lane.</p>

<p>If you lower this to a matter of "rights," you lose.</p>

[neilambrose]

<p>What an interesting post. Shame I missed so much of it. Some observations from me:</p>

 

<blockquote>

<p>I am not some KID! I am the person your daughter hired to take her wedding pictures! (Annie)</p>

</blockquote>

<p>Hmm. I do take photos of other people with their cameras. It's a nice thing to do, and I'm a nice kind of person. Usually two or three times every wedding. It never occurred to me that I should think this was somehow beneath me - mainly because refusing to help someone take a picture would say nothing about me as a photographer, but it would say a lot about me as a person.</p>

<p>I'm definitely not some kid (probably at least 10 years older than you), I'm fairly expensive, I do a lot of destination weddings and I cater to a high-end client base. And I still take pictures for anyone who cares to hand me a camera. And I enjoy doing so, although I frequently struggle to figure out how to work their crazy small cameras. :-)</p>

<p> Being nice can bring new clients too. One wedding I shot three years ago has produced eight more clients, and I still get more referrals.</p>

<p> </p>

[kris-bochenek]

<p>I was shooting guests tables and one of them asked me to take the same photo with his PS I did it why not?<br>

guy is happy B&G are happy I am happy life goes on.</p>

[model mayhem gallery]

<p>As a photographer at a Wedding or any event I like taking the pictures. No matter what or who's camera I am using. I feel I am paid to be the expert photographer in the house and if mom wants me to take an expert picture with her camera so she can put in her scap book or what ever she does that is fine. <br>

I don't feel you are not being taken serious just because someone asks you to use their camera to take a picture. Actually, quite the opposite. I see it as a sign of respect that she recognized you as the professional in the house and turned her camera over to you.<br>

Lighten up and have fun....</p>

[zack_lau]

<p>I also see being chosen as a sign of respect--I'd take the photo as best I could.<br />You wouldn't still be wearing the same style of clothes you wore in your early 20s, would you? They show this all the time on "What Not to Wear" on TLC, during the "before" part of the show. I'm hoping they do a show on a middle age petite guy, so I can see where they find clothes for him in NYC. There are actually guys who buy old clothes on Ebay, when they made smaller sizes.</p>

[nathan_tia]

<p>Take the picture. It's not like a flock of people are asking you to do it. This is the bride's mom for ch%%% sake. If you really run into issues (i doubt you will) with guests asking you to shoot pictures for them, all you have to say is - I'm sorry but I was hired by the bride and groom to shoot pictures of them and I really need to focus on capturing their special moment. You are free to take a few pictures of the bride and groom when I am done. You really can't be coined as a "snippy - snotty photographer" because you are also relying on referral business. Be professional, courteous and above all - put your pride aside.</p>

[silverfox]

<p>Well, Im not a wedding photographer but would deffinatley have taken the picture for her. Any money lost from doing so could be redeemed by taking some old tyres back to Home Depot. (Sorry), thanks to John Boseley for that one.</p>

[sd_woods]

<p>Wear a photo vest and lighten up</p>

[Member69643]

<p>Photography is no longer the secret, mysterious process it used to be. Images captured in a little black box that weren't seen for days have been replaced by instant pictures for all. It used to be that the negative was the true image and the output (prints) came from that negative. Now the digital photo very often IS the desired output. Mom is no dummy, despite the heavy makeup and outlandish hat. :) She knows that if YOU have the digital file she must go through you to get output. So she has you take one with her camera on her own memory card. She doesn't care squat about quality. She just wants control. That's what it all boils down to, who has control. Professional photographers for years charged far more than a typical drugstore and could, because they had control. It still made people mad. They all "knew" that the drugstore charged $5.99 for an 8x10 - why is the photographer making me pay him $25.00???</p>

<p>Mom wants control. Mom wants to pay $5.99 for that 8x10. Those of you who think mom is going to give you a good reference are mistaken. Mom no longer cares. Mom has her $5.99 8x10. Mom doesn't care about you, your business, nor your family. Even the photo is worth little to her if she has to go through you. If you DON'T take the picture you still won't make a sale to her. Mom is a thief pure and simple but she thinks you're the thief, charging so much for that 8x10 that everyone knows costs $5.99</p>

<p>Get all your money up front. The days of making money on print sales are history.</p>

[jennifer_spencer]

<p>I was just thinking about the TV show "What Not to Wear" as well. They had an episode with a petite young woman who was never taken seriously either. They changed her hair and did a lot of work with off the rack ladies' clothes and a tailor (she was very small - so much she was shopping in the kids' department). </p>

<p>I was going to suggest that you find a department store that you like, and spend a couple of hundred dollars getting a wardrobe chosen or advised by their fashion stylist/personal shopper. That person could probably help you get a very professional look going and maybe recommend a hairstylist if you want a change there too. When I was first doing secretarial work, many years ago, for investment bankers, this really helped me. The service was free and I only spent a couple hundred dollars on clothes that worked great and projected the professional, put together image I needed. </p>

<p>The other thing you can work on is poise. The state of mind that 1) it is nice to be nice and 2) you expect everyone to act appropriately. If requests are not reasonable such as in part 1), and people are not acting appropriately, you look at them with curiosity, like they have two heads, and ask them to clarify their request (because maybe you misunderstood - they could never has asked for *that* inappropriate thing). Look people in the eye and speak kindly but with confidence. It's amazing how that keeps people honest and brings the tone of a problem down to where you can be nice and everyone is pleasant. I learned this trick from my gracious grandmother - and no one, I mean no one, takes advantage of her. </p>

<p>I think in this case, trying to be a bigger person, be gracious, is the way to go most of the time. I take pictures with other people's cameras because what does it hurt? If I am in the middle of something serious, then I can explain they need to wait a minute or I can't right now, but if I am just doing candid shots, then sure. Why not? Whether or not we use a guest's camera and do them a favor doesn't have anything to do with our stature as professionals, just as you said - it's about service.</p>

[rick vincent]

<p>Take the picture for god's sake. No one said it has to be good. </p>

[William Michael]

<p ><strong><em>Taking a snapshot of a formal portrait you posed lessens the value of the work you just did.</em></strong> </p>

<p > </p>

<p >Respectfully, IMO this theory is: Poppycock. The reverse is in fact true - the act adds value to and worth to the Professional and thus to the Professional’s work.</p>

<p > </p>

<p >So, taking this purely mathematically, your theory could be correct, but the weight of experienced opinion seems to be against you in this sampling. </p>

<p > </p>

<p >***</p>

<p > </p>

<p ><strong><em>"I did it ONCE, and once people saw I was willing, asked me for the rest of the wedding to do it, interfering with my job and making me very uncomfortable."</em></strong></p>

<p > </p>

<p >Having predicted this response from someone, in my first post (Sep 27, 2009; 10:36 p.m.) I have already given one method which manages both the Mother's request and this specific situation in which you found yourself. </p>

<p > </p>

<p >***</p>

<p > </p>

<p ><strong ><em >“Mom wants control. Mom wants to pay $5.99 for that 8x10. Those of you who think mom is going to give you a good reference are mistaken. Mom no longer cares . . . etc”</em></strong><strong ><em ></em></strong></p>

<p > </p>

<p > </p>

<p >Must be a different breed of "Moms" where you live and work Wolfeye - if I worked there I would move. </p>

<p > </p>

<p >I've had my share of tough nuts to crack – and some fuelled with grog, too. But mostly all Mums at Weddings, who have asked a favour of me, were genuine in their request – and many now just want to stick it on their face-book page or screensaver and send to their sister overseas - maybe I am just naive.</p>

<p > </p>

<p >Yes - I agree making money on Print Sales is in decline, and at differing rates in different locales. But this fact has little, if anything, to do with the Mom asking for one picture to be taken with her camera.</p>

<p > </p>

<p >WW </p>

<p > </p>

 

[mjferron]

<p>I am a department manager for a huge retail corporation. Let me share something with you. At staff meeting every week we discuss many aspects of the business. The most important number discussed is that relating to customer satisfaction. No one is perfect at it but we bend over backward to try and please the customer. An attitude like yours could get you fired at my store. Get over yourself. Take the point and shoot, aim it at mother in law and shoot. It was an honor for her to ask you. Less ego and more humility will serve you well.</p>

[rascal64]

<p>I am sure that she did not intend to insult you, humiliate you or devalue your abilities. People who are not passionate about photography have no ego connected to their camera. Take the picture and be gracious. This is her daughter's big day. It is not about you.</p>

[scott_murphy_photography]

<p>Personally, I would have taken the photo. We get a lot of tourists in our town, some from overseas and I get asked often to do the very same thing. I never have a problem with it, in fact I am glad to do it for them. Especially for the foreign tourists, I don't want them walking away with a bad taste in their mouth for our town because someone would not take their picture with their own camera.</p>

[ken_vasey]

<p>I did my apprenticeship with a well know female British wedding photgrapher and her solution was when people starting gathering around her to take pictures she would request that they take their pictures first and then finish setting up her shot. She would also remind the other budding photographers not to shoot as to spoil her exposure. And as someone else pointed out dispurse the group quickly once she had her shot. We used to get asked a lot to take pictures its always good to say yes. Most of the time the cameras are not pro ones anyway. Hope that helps. Ken</p>

[flietyer]

<p>Anni,<br>

Look at it this way.<br>

You've just loaded up your car with all your gear for that all important wedding(wait until you have a daughter and see what all-important means). You jump in behind the wheel only to discover that you left your lights on last night and you are going nowhere.<br>

Aw but I am across the street working on your neibors car and you know all you need is a good start and you'll be just fine. So you rush over to me to see if Ill give a damsil in distress a hand.<br>

Would my profesional reputation aided or hindered if I took a few minutes to help you? no charge of course. Would you remember who to call when you actually needed service on your car if I told you to "go pound sand"? If I help you I do it at the risk of never profitting from the experiance, while you get something for free. However what I might lose I may also gain ten fold, It's a gamble I will always take.</p>

<p>Mark Williams,<br>

I've been one of those guys with the camera who someone like you helped, Thanks<br>

wlt</p>

[jerry_schuler]

<p>"HOW CAN I STOP THIS FROM HAPPENING TO ME????"<br>

When they hand you the camera just take it and walk away.</p>

[steve_bellayr]

<p>Why not take one picture and hand back the camera with a business card?</p>