nice photography joke

[anesh]

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate

father to start their family.

 

 

 

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye

and said, "Well, I'm off now the man should be here soon."

 

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer

happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

 

Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to...''

 

" Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been

expecting you."

 

"Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you know

babies are my specialty?"

 

"Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat."

After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"

 

"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch,

and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is

fun. You can really spread out there."

 

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!"

 

"Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try

several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure

you'll be pleased with the results."

 

"My, that's a lot!" gasped Mrs. Smith.

 

"Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and

out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that."

 

"Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.

 

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby

pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said.

 

"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

 

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their

mother was so difficult to work with."

 

"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.

 

"Yes, I'm afraid so I finally had to take her to the park to get the job

done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good

look"

 

"Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

 

"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too.

 

The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly

concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.

 

Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to

pack it all in."

 

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your,

uh...equipment?"

 

"It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we

can get to work right away."

 

"Tripod?"

 

"Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too

big to be held in the hand very long."

 

Mrs. Smith fainted

[yann1]

Thanks, first time I laugh today, wish to read some more like this on PN.

[savagesax]

This is why I sold my nikons and bought canons!

[sheryl_bury_michals]

Anesh,

 

that's classic!

 

really good, and I plan to share even with my non-photo.net people.

 

thanks for passing that on.

 

sheryl

[PuppyDigs]

Cool

[pjmeade]

:-)

[corrim]

Loved it...thank you!

[tommyinca]

Good way to start a morning. Better then the comic strip :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) This one is a fives.

[gary_watson]

Old-school cornball still works.Very reminiscent of the groaners my late Dad loved collecting and telling. Thanks.

[stembaughphotography]

Actually this one has been around awhile- but always maks one smile-

And I laugh just hard each time as I did the first. Sooooooooooooooooo, Did he get the gig or not?

[ellis_vener_photography]

Two elderly women, sisters, went to have their portrait made at a studio that had been in business very long time. The photographer arranged the sisters in a pleasing manner, smoothed their dresses, and tuned the lighting to make them look radiantly beautiful, complementing them on their appearance all of the while. The women were enjoying the fuss. It had been a long time since someone had paid so much attention to them.

 

At last the photographer retreated to his camera and said he'd be ready in just a minute. As he disappeared under the view camera darkcloth, in a quiet whisper the younger asked the other "What's he doing now?"

 

"Don't you know anything? He's going to focus!"

 

Excitedly came the reply, "Both of us?"

[stembaughphotography]

Cute! Haven't heard that one before.