Miriana

Thanks for the critiques!

drama with a capital D

The face of the model is really beautiful, and your aproximation very effective 6/6

Pretty model, nice dress, good color, but a very unnatural, very unflattering pose. It looks as though she is having a seizure.

My 2 cents - truly could have been a GREAT shot, but the pose doesnt work. So I hope you wont mind if I offer some really specific (constructive) suggestions for the next try?

 

You could have had it squarely in the 'coulda been a contender' spot without changing her pose from the neck down. Just have her draw the neck up/out a touch so the line from the clavicle up the neck to the jaw is more smooth & then tip her chin down a tiny bit.

 

Now, that said, I'd go a bit farther and make a couple subtle changes to the angles she's going for with the arms (keep going for those angular lines though!)

*Left shoulder should have been pulled back & up more square, fingers of left hand pointing towards the camera

*Right arm shouldnt be bent - but gently draped off the chair arm.. more of a diagonal line from her shoulder down across top of the chair arm with her hand trailing off the side

*Have her sit just a TOUCH taller, not *quite* so far forward, so her waist is more accentuated (the dress really is great)

*Then she should be able to cock her face into the light almost as dramatically as in this shot, but without having to twist her neck & pull back quite so unnaturally. Honestly, if you reshot it that way I think you'd wind up with a really knockout shot.

 

Hopefully you dont get offended, but I can so clearly see 'the fix' in my head that it'd be a shame not to at least *offer* to share it :)