Competing with professional photographer in the bridal party

[achristensen]

I have known for a month or so that the sister of the groom for my first wedding

shoot is a professional photographer. The groom informed me today that she will

be bringing her camera- no problem. She may have some tips for me if I get in a

jam. He also mentioned that she was pretty pushy with the photographer who took

her wedding photos and was constantly telling him how to compose his shots. If

she "takes over", what should I do?

[Leonard-just-Leonard]

Let her. Make sure you update your contract with a clause about interference from "other parties" if they prevent you from getting the shots as required. Even take photos of this other person's meddling if necessary....

[johnmottershaw]

She sounds a real pain in the....

 

Tell the bride and groom in advance that they should tell her not to interfere.

[hooman_b]

You're the pro on the shoot. You were hired, she wasn't. She is also a pro, not just a

"guest with a camera". I don't mean this in a rude way, just being blunt. Act like a

professional.

[jo_dinning]

Tell your clients politely that whilst you have no issue with guests taking photos (no matter who they are or what they do) that you however will not tolerate them getting in the way or interrupting you whilst you work - this is no doubt (I hope) your policy when you work anyway.

 

In the event that the sister gets in the way on the day, tell her politely, but in no uncertain terms, that in the same way that she wouldn't take suggestions from a guest, you won't either.

 

At this wedding, you're the pro, she's the guest - keep it that way.

[davebell]

I agree with Hooman. Put your foor down now, before it gets messy. The contract advice by L.J. is a good one, but maybe its too late for that.

[anov]

Hey, maybe she reads photo.net too which would make it easier on you.

 

Or maybe have the B&G suggest this link to her ;)

[annealmasy]

For what it's worth, we've been given similar "warnings" before, then we arrive at the

wedding to find that the other photographer is totally professional and fabulous. Just

be the confidant professional that you are, and if you have to, encourage the sister to

"just enjoy the day, and trust me to take wonderful photographs of everyone!" with lots

and lots of smiles and positive energy thrown in. It's usually only a crisis if you make

it one. :)

[david_schilling___chicago_]

This is your first wedding???

 

Like Anne says above, I wouldn't be the lest bit surprised that you might "find that the other photographer is totally professional and fabulous". But if she's truly a pro and the groom's sister, I would suggest that you contact her (via the B/G of course) and meet up for a serious heart to heart before the big day. Be honest, ask for her guidance/assistance and accept it.

 

Something doesn't feel right about this though....if she is a pro, and she understands that this is your first wedding..... I donno, doesn't add up for me. For sure, get back to the forum afterwards, I'd love to hear how this whole things pans out. Good luck :-)

[dave_shilling__sacramento_]

I honestly doubt that she's going to be a huge bother... I can only assume that the reason you were brought in at all was because the sister will be in the wedding, and wont have time to capture all the moments/details, etc. Not to mention, the people behind the cameras are never in the picture. I would accept it as a learning experience if she is a wedding photographer and provides some advice for you. Its like having a built-in mentor, who also knows the family. I agree that you should talk to her before the wedding and seek guidance.

[l_e]

What you do depends on your personality and your style. I completely understand how intimidating this can be, especially if this is your first wedding.

 

If I were you I would do a bit of research to find out more about the person of concern. Look at her website and see if her style is similar to yours, or a style you would like to emulate. If it is then you can take pointers from her if you would like. If her style is very different than yours then I would suggest not taking much input from her.

 

Remember just because she is a 'Pro' doesn't mean she will be professional, or even good at being a photographer.

 

You don't want to make a scene but I would think of different polite ways to tell her that you do not need or want her input. Something along the lines of... 'that fits your style very well, but it isn't my style of wedding photography'. Or, 'lets do it this way first then if we have time we can experiment with other ways' - then don't make time.

 

Remember you are not competing with the other photographer.

[tim_klimowicz]

Amy should strongly defend her position as THE photographer

and shouldn't let any guests (professional or not) get in the way or otherwise inhibit

her shooting, guests have any right to bring and shoot with whatever the hell they

want, so long as they don't get in the shoot or do anything to make Amy's job

harder. Point & shoot, SLR, view camera, whatever.

 

 

It sounds like a good idea to add a clause to the contract with

something about "interference" from guests, and maybe ask the bride/groom if

there's someone other than them that you can talk to if this person happens to start

being a problem and won't listen to your requests for them to stop interfering. Worst

thing, I'd imagine, would be to bring the bride & groom into the drama about it during

their own wedding....but at least let them know what's up in advance.

[picturesque]

Being that the photographer is related to the groom, I don't think you can be pushy and make demands. You'll just have to see how she is that day, and go on a case by case basis. If it were me, I would go the route of least resistance every time until a time comes where it really will destroy the images you are working on, if it comes to that. Then, I would get through the incident and then have a talk with the photographer. Always nice, and always deferring, but firmly asking her to let you do the job you were hired to do. If that doesn't work, I would just avoid contact and get on with your job.

[cjogo]

Since we generally shoot most of the Bride/Groom/Families ~ 2 hours before the ceremony.......we have little problem with other shooters arriving. Our style is very traditional :: little true candids. So we welcome all the shooters there are, for post activities. The more the merry for candid grabbing. We do explain to the B&G, that if the token "Uncle Bill~Aunt Till " gets in the way of my setups---he/she ( or a shoulder, elbow, etc ) will be forever immortalized in their wedding photos. We leave the situation up to them to to "police" the matter.

[jeffrey_blake_adams]

This is your first wedding. NO doubt, the B&G and Sis are concerned that you will be able to create all the images they wish to have made. Sis will be back up, and hopefully a friendly mentor. If you appear not in control or floundering expect her to take over to "save the day." I hope you charged enough up front and are not counting on after sales. Do what you do best, learn and try to understand their POV. Tlak about it w the B&G and sis, b4 the day. Be honest. There is a flow to a wedding and places you need to be b4 things happen, and ways to make it all go smooth, if she is a pro, she will know those things, learn them. next time in your interview w prospective B&G, make sure to bring up how guests can make the most positive contribution to the wedding album. Be sure you deliver what your contract promises. Some of my students have seen this situation get ugly after, w b&g demanding a refund since they preferred the family member's photos. For myself, and many, this is never a problem, as dealing with people is the number one talent you need to do weddings. Creating allies from potential enemies is essential. J

[joe_appel]

Nadine Ohara offered some excellent advice. You'll undoubtedly be successful in this situation if you follow it.

 

I've just got to wonder why the couple didn't ask for the sister's recommendations for a photographer given that she herself couldn't do the pictures. Hmm.

[William Michael]

I was at my Niece`s Wedding recently, I had a 5D + 50mm and a Mamy 645 with a wide angle lens it, which I put in the boot of the car after taking some scenic shots around the outside of the Chapel, it was by the sea and it was late afternoon light.

 

The professional was using 2 x 20D, neither with an L lens.

 

He looked at me when I arrived in, I waved and said: `do a good job.`

 

He watched me for a bit, I think, but after that he just did his job.

 

I took a couple with my 5D inside the Church, no Flash. A few outside, and a couple at the reception.

 

Frankly, I was less of a `problem` than the `Uncle Joe` with a point and shoot Flash in the face that distracts the Subject`s attention or the `Aunty Mary` who has a `Rebel` and wants to argue the toss about how much Professionals are a rip off.

 

As many have advised, go about your business in a professional manner and deal things as they unfold, politely.

 

The other point I pick up on is David Schilling`s comment:

 

`Something doesn't feel right about this though....if she is a pro, and she understands that this is your first wedding..... I donno, doesn't add up for me. `

 

It does not add up for me either, and I have this theory . . .

 

I cannot see that it has been yet disclosed: Firstly if the Bride and Groom are aware this is your first Wedding, and secondly if that information has been given to the Groom`s sister.

 

If the information about this being your maiden voyage is not public knowledge, then IMO, this might be more the cause of your concern.

 

If this is so, then you need to deal with that issue, first, and decide whom if any one you should inform and or confide in.

 

WW

[William Michael]

There could be many reasons why a B or G does not ask a Relation in the business for a recommendation, local area knowledge is one obvious one.

 

And it has not been disclosed that they did NOT ask the Sister`s advice: perhaps they did, and were not comfortable with the referrals.

 

WW

[cariad]

This can become a very difficult situation, but go into the wedding with the idea that it won't. After I shot weddings for a couple of years the same thing happened to me. I think it was the grooms sister............I let her be until she started to interfere with my set ups and disrupt my shooting flow, I was strapped for time as it was because of delays at the church. I asked her with a smile please to let me do my job and after I was done she could take the pictures she would like to.

Well, she did, but was frowning at me for the rest of the evening............

and when my flash decided to stop working just as they were cutting the

cake in a very dark room..............she let out the most awful laugh in front of all the guest..........and showed her real bad side. I just smiled

and asked if we could repeat the shot and went about my business of

finishing the wedding I contracted to do. All she accomplished was that

I had several of the people including the couple that watched this all afternoon tell me how wonderful

I had handled the situation and how terrible they felt that I had to put up

with that kind of behavior from somebody that they thought was a pro.

I let all of it just roll of my back..........after all I was there because the

couple loved my pictures and knew I could do the job well...........and

I was not about to let her put me on her level.

So if something similiar happens to you grin and bare it, correct it if you

have to, but do with a smile and kindness, because the number one thing you want is for the couple to have a wonderful wedding and not

be the one that creates difficulties on their wedding day.

Good luck :)!

[achristensen]

Its strange... really... the dynamics. I wish I had known about the sister before I took the job and signed the contract because frankly, I will have enough to think about. Someone mentioned I look for her website- I could not find one. I would love to see her stuff. I agree with Nadine, I don't want to make a scene with the family and since she definitely has more experience, I am sure she could help if I was in a bind. But this is my gig too and I have some pretty specific ideas about what I like. I don't think they consulted her but I am sure that she knows about me now. The groom also said today, "Don't worry too much. My sister will be there and she can do a lot of photos also." Should I just call her? BTW, she's not a member here, at least not under her own name.

[colinsouthern]

Personally, I'd "go with the flow" - on one hand you may be right, or on the other hand you may be creating a problem that doesn't exist.

 

I'm sure that if she's a professional then she'll extend professional courtesy to you; If she makes any suggestions, then consider them (as the pilot in command of a multi-crew airliner would do) - but the final decision rests with you.

 

Perhaps run it past the B&G that "you percieve this as a potential problem" and that "I'll be giving her a polite 'Thank you, but I'll be doing this my way' talk if she distracts me from my game plan, if that's OK with you".

 

To continue an aviation analogy, how would you feel being on a plane that had two sets of controls and both pilots wanted to go to different places? It just doesn't work - they either have to co-operate or the captain pulls rank (and that's YOU by the way!).

[picturesque]

It is up to you whether to call her. On the one hand, she may become a lamb after talking to you--mother hen training a young photographer kind of thing. Or, she may decide she really needs to take over, so this is a risk, in my opinion. Without further information, possibly from the groom, re how she is likely to react, I would not.

[gpjoell3]

Amy,

 

I know you are very nervous since this is your first wedding and there will be a professional photography at the wedding taking photos. However, you were hired by the Bride and Groom. I am sure they know your experience. I would not worry about the Groom's sister. Just do your thing. If she wants to assist, why not let her. If she is experienced, you may learn a thing or two. Here is my take on things. Plan to shoot the weddings as normal. If she approaches you, just greet her and exchange conversation. You will know immediately if she is a true professional. If you were unable to find her website or if you can not locate her on either Googles or Yahoo, chances are, she is a photographer but not actively promoting herself as one. I would not put her on a pedistal. She may be a professional photographer, but not a wedding photographer. Some of my good friends who are photographers are not wedding photographers. They are great portrait photographers who would never photograph a wedding. Wedding photographers are unique and well versed on many aspects of photography that portrait photographers aren't. Just do your thing, and if she gets in your way, do what I do. Sit down and let the guess shoot til there hearts are content. Once the Bride and Groom get tire of this photographer, you will have it your way. Don't fight the wave, ride it to the end.

 

George

[Jerry_]

If the 'sister photographer' shows up with (for example) a Canon 5D, two lenses, and a flash or two, as she shoots the same thing you are shooting at the wedding. Who do you think will get the reprint order after the wedding? Chances are, if the 'sister photographer' has prints equal to your work, you are going to take a loss with the wedding. There is no middle ground here: you have a fine chance to have a shadow for each and every shot you take at the wedding. Not a grand idea....

[rogerjporter]

she sounds to me like the perfect person to use to round up the family shots and make

sure every aunt and uncle gets their pictures with the bride and groom, she's going to

know all the family members, and be a big help to you... keeping her busy with this might

keep her mind off the shooting. If that doesn't work you could hide her camera bag.