The Captives

Going home, on the floor of a freight car, on a sunday night after a

rock festival. Ratings and comments, please.

The face of the guy in the window is wonderful, the hand in foreground would be cool if the other people were not there... like this, it really ruins the composition.

I disagree with the previous comment directed at the hand and "it" as a compositional device in accordance with the people behind it. I find it works startlingly well, compounded by it's centered and out of focus nature . To strengthen this composition I suggest bringing the eye closer to the center of the image by way of precise yet soft burning of the corners to vignette the image and thus add some pop and a focal point. As it stands it has much promise but I don't find it strong enough to be as captivating as it could and should be. The framing is overall very interesting, but the tone could use depth. I understand the idea of the muted tone but don't necessarilly agree with it in this compact composition. And in one more note towards the idea of burning the corners .... the left corner is to hot and draws the eye away from the center towards the disfunctional left doing nothing for the image, that definitaly needs darkening. Thanks.

very interesting! don't know what or why but just is.

I also think that the composition is still working, though I find the hand a bit distracting, but the on the other hand it might be that it (the first hand) hides some distracting detail. I will absolutely try to burn in the corners. Would the circular gradient followed by history brush for the rest of the image do the trick?

The hand is cool, my previous message has been misunderstood (or badly written!), it gives DOF. I don't like how it overlaps the people there. I think you should try several possibilities:

 

1. burning the hand, heavily!

 

2. burning all the rest.

 

3. forgot!

 

Play around (maybe a bit of more contrast is needed) and you'll get something better. If only the person on the left was there, it would have been wonderful... but you cannot ask tired people to move away to take a picture, I know!

 

cheers, b.

I might consider burning the hand, but then on the other hand the only digital manipulations so far has been lifting of some shadows and sharpening. And as I am trying to keep my street photos as straight as possible I'm leaning tovards your alternative 3. Cheers!

K.

Don't be hard on yourself... dodging and burning is the same thing you could achieve in a darkroom.