Corrective Vision!

Another version on the same theme!

 

Difficult to see at this size but hopefully you get the idea!

We see a lot of pictures like this on this site. Here is my version.

Would be grateful for feedback on this and the version that I have

posted as a comment! Whatever.... I hope you enjoy!

The second one it is really really better. Great idea and well done.

Thanks Michele,

 

I agree with you. However when viewed large you can see the limitations of my PS skills. This has to do with the fact that I am using a touch pad and am in the possession of fat fingers!!!

 

Thanks for your comment!

 

I like best the one with the blurred effect. Why don't you try withouth the keys (because they should be blurred as they are not "lensed", but you don't want to blur them, so there is a dilemma in leaving them there)?

The keys were a diversion. I tried the pic without them but it didn't look right! (Rather Bland!)

 

Thanks!

I like the blurred version better. Anyways, this is a very innovative and interesting concept. I liked this. Congrats for a great pic!

Probably a golden colored lighter or a posh fountain pen would have been better instead of the keys.

photo.7/7

Thank you both.

 

I agree. A pen may be more appropriate but perhaps a little obvious!

Ohhh, thank God it is just a photo.

I thought I was having a flashback to Berkeley 1967.

Seriously David, nice concept and execution.

A similar effect can be achieved by drinking too much wine!

 

Thanks for your kind words!

I like the second one better. And I would also take the keys out; they don't really make sense in this photo. Nice job though.

I prefer the 2nd one too. However, the first is a more graphic illustration of the title. I think it works better in this forum.

 

As for the keys, they are a distraction. The picture needs something or I feel it would be a little boring!

 

Thanks for looking!

What a great idea, David! I love the posted first version, may be without the keys. The wavy effect is more catchy, but the blurred version is clever too. Nice one!

It seems not too many people like the keys!

I also like the blurred text better than the smudged, but I think that the keys are good, I enjoy the color and vairance they add. True they don't contribute to the story (how are the keys connected to the text?), but what if they did? Maybe a road map or the owners manuel to a car. I don't know, but I think that you could tie the keys to the blurred text while keeping the same feel.

Tyler,

 

In many ways this was an experiment! For me, as for many others the 2nd version is much better. However, in thumbnail it is not obvious to see what the point of the photograph is. Since this is a visual medium, I decided to create a very graphic image so that the idea could be conveyed in a thumbnail.

 

I am glad you like the keys! I like them too! However we are in the minority!

 

There is not connection between the keys and the text. The points you make are valid but in my opinion would make the photograph a bit of a cliche

 

Thanks for stopping by!

 

I like the second version. The first one nerves me. Great idea!

Natalia,

 

My intention was not to 'nerve' anyone. Thanks for looking and commenting!

First thing that came to mind: this is what my textbooks looked like to me after studying for too long in University.

 

Great idea and execution. The second photo illustrates the "corrective vision" more logically - but then again, the logical choice is rarely the most interesting one...

Hi, I love it, I saw 'focal points' first though.

I suppose 'corrective vision' would be an easier glasses advertisement for the general public.

I like the keys because they add colour, texture, and weight to the composition.

 

 

It is nice to see positive comments on this photograph. It is one that I like a lot myself. Having said that, I am not sure why.

 

Thank you both!

wow, i really like the idea of this photo..very creative--you are very good, Jace

Thanks Jace. It's nearly 2 years since anyone commented on this picture. I had forgotten about it. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.