rationalizing the purchase of new gear to your spouse...

any suggestions? I'm trying to convince my wife to let me buy a 50mm 1.7 lens

for my *ist. lol, I fear I might be hooped. Thanks,

 

Ry

If you have problems buying a 50/1.7, then you REALLY have problems.

 

Try suggesting a 600/4 and see what happens...

lol, thanks Bob, she keeps a tight leash on funds around here. I don't think she realizes how much I enjoy photography and the pros and cons of different lenses in regards to results.

It's a tough balance at times. I got an 8x10 camera in beautiful condition, with a great lens not too long ago, but it took some sincere effort on my part to make it clear that this is not just some flash in the pan. Once I got that across, the rest was cake.

 

My Dad always told me "Son, you have to pick your battles." After 21 years with my wife I can say without hesitation that he knew what he was talking about. My method goes something like this: When you really want something, make it clear that it means something to you and you won't have any problems, but if you just want it for no particular reason, don't push it...

 

- Randy

Thanks Randy, I'll give it a shot in a few days and see if I could convince her. Its funny that you mention the quote from your Dad as mine told me something very similar on my wedding day "now Ryan, if you're ever about to debate something with her you have to ask yourself, is this the hill you want to die on?". Lol, I guess fathers know best. The crazy thing is that I can get one for about $50 bucks cdn. She's just denying me because I told her when I got my new camera that I'd be happy playing with it as is for the following 6 months. I'll have to really start thinking before I speak. Thanks,

 

Ry

Hi Ryan...I sell snowmobiles and all terrain vehicles for a living.....Our standing policy to guys that have to "ask the wife" is the following..(this is all in good fun) And I quote..."It is easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission....." Seriously, my loving wife of 21 years keeps me on a tight leash with my photo stuff too. But how I financed the bulk of my hobby is with Ebay. As long as I am buying and selling and no major "fundage" comes out of the daily budget she doesn't hassle me...So, consider ebay..surely you have a hubcab, baseball card, gun, bow, old golf clubs, books, records..you get the idea...Any old photo equip? Also, see if you have any pics you can sell at a show, auction, publication, etc. Trust me, if you found a widget now for 50 bucks, another will be available a week from now! Have fun and appreciate the fact your wife allowed you to have the camera you do and reminder her that your hobby is cheaper than therapy or bar hopping!

Enjoy! Mark

Get her hooked on horses. You'll be poor, but new photo equipment won't be a big discussion anymore... ;-)

 

Cheers,

 

Geoff S.<div></div>

LOL thats the best idea yet. Thanks Jeff

Buy something for your wife at the same time - jewelery, a dozen roses etc. She won't even notice your new lens :-)

Here is an idea that works wonders for me...

budget and save up a little each day. It will add up in the long run.

 

Talk to here and tell her your going to try saving up to the new lens purchase. Start out like with $5-$20 a week. say what you going to save it up for and stick to it. She might like the idea you can budget and save money. Mine did.

 

Some tips on saving...

It will be tempting to spend that money on something else. (I don't know how it is for you so forgive these examples) Look at what you personally spend your money on. I know so many people that spend almost $5-$10 a day on some coffee confection they don't know how to say the name of. The best thing is just when your about to spend extra money ask your self if that extra coffee drink or sub or what ever means more than a new what ever your saving for. try it.

 

You know if you save $5 a day that be about $1825 thats enough for almost five prim lenses at about $400 each in a year. Or 1 or 2 good zooms. It works. I save about $20 a week and support 3 expensive hobbies on it. you can do it just stick too it!

 

Hope it works and she lets ya!

 

Justin

 

PS!

do not put the money you saving up any were in your car, wallet, bank (unless it is one you don't go to or can't easily) or anywhere that you have access to when your out or some where you might be tempted to take it with you. As they say moeny can burn a whole in your pocket.

This is where the rule of thirds comes in...take the price and divide it by three...Sound like a better price?

Thanks guys, these are all great ideas. I guess the key is to be patient and save up. When I can afford to buy her a horse, I get my gear. Again, thanks for the ideas.

 

Ry

Tell her that you are having a midlife crisis and that its either a motorcycle or a lens.

That would work if I wasn't 26 LOL.... she might get a little worried. Thanks

Some years back we put ourselves on a budget, each getting an allowance for such things as clothes, meals out, coffee, gifts, and toys. It's funny how much this reduced our expenses, as any money I save is *mine alone* to do with whatever I want, and I have a more personal interest in finding less expensive ways to do things. As long as it's all joint funds, there is less incentive to save, and more incentive to get one's share out of the family budget. As long as she's only spending her allowance, I don't care what she buys, and vise-versa.

 

The other part of the deal is any money we make from secondary sources we get to keep as our own. So I started buying & selling on ebay to make a few bucks, and I started going after more weddings. She got a second part time job. Now, we're both happy.

 

It's a simple budgeting system that works well for us, but it takes a while for the savings to accumulate.

BTW, another way to do this is to buy the lens without her knowing about it, and stash it in the closet for a couple months. Then drag it out, and when she asks about it say, "This old thing? No, it's not new, I've had it for a long time.

 

If you've ever been a Patric McMannus fan, you've read a derivative of that line.

 

On the other hand, I think your wife has got the right idea about reducing spending on toys. And, unless you're making money with it, a toy is what it is. You don't need it. It can wait.

Hey Jim, you're not supposed to take her side! (jk) Sounds like a good plan, I'll bounce that one off her as well. I like the idea of having my own money again. Since we've been together, it seems like everything has been pooled and I have to ask permission to buy anything, whether I saved or not. But seeing as you're the second person to bring this up, does ebay have that much of a profit margin? I mean, unless you have a reserve on every item or on the flip side, charge a higher shipping rate, does it really pan out in your favor?

If you need your wife's permission to buy a lens, any lens, you have let her get out of control. I am not at all suggesting that you smack her and tell her to shut up, my wife is vociferous too. But When I buy a lens or camera it is with MY money, not hers. If she says anything I simply laugh and remind her of that. If you are spending the money that your wife earns on her job, then you should ask her!

What worked for me was to get my wife interested in photography "I bought this for you, dear". Of course, the danger is your spouse becomes very interested in photography and there goes the kit into the field without you.

Tell your wife at least you are not considering other women unless it is to take a photo, which better then? Or the best thing is to get her to cretic your photo's and tell you what she thinks would be more artistic to her and then once a week try to do something that she has suggested. By envolving her in your work she will see the need for better equipment and be more aproving of your reasons for better upgrades.

honestly, I usually just bought it and didn't say anything. But, then I usually bought a lens, used it for a year before I bought another one. And in the days of film only cameras, I did fairly well with a 28mm, 50mm, and a 70-200mm zoom for about 6 years. Plus, you yourself did apparently offer the 6 month wait on your own.......errr.........live with it......heh.

 

However, having said that, if you only have slower lenses (aperture wise), then the 50mm 1.7 variety that each manufacturer has for around $60 is probably the best bargain in ALL of photography.

 

Perhaps scouring the web for pics taken in very low light with a fast lens.....any focal length....and using them as your computer screen background for a while, and just commenting with something like...."Can't wait until WE can afford a faster lens, so WE can have pics like these in nice moody low light scenes"..........might get her to budge a little earlier.....especially if it's pics she likes too.

I try to ensure a reasonable proportion of the packages that come into the house are for my wife - the odd bit of perfume, a nice silk scarf, whatever - it really helps. If all the stuff is for you, of course your wife will object.

Ryan, I think what Jim said about it being a toy has a lot of truth about it. However, even if it is a toy there's no reason you can't get one, unless you go broke doing so.

 

I always set the scene, talk about how with this or that lens I could have got this or that shot. If she's with me I'll point out how much easier or better a shot would have been. After a short time, of suggesting the need, you can find a reason to buy the lens.

 

Of course, I've been aided by a work colleague of my wife, who did buy a 600/f4 and she is heavily into riding horses.

I'd still try that midlife crisis line...

I'm lucky in that my partner feeds my passion of photography and foregoes the diamonds ;) I

suggest you feed her passion.