How do you photograph your wife?

<p>Luca Alessandro Remotti has a nice picture of his wife in his portfolio, but concedes that she is very difficult to photograph. Well, I think this is universal for husbands of wives. Searching photo.net for "wife" turns up a few things but nothing to help me. What ruses do the successful husbands employ? One of my better efforts was a candid 90mm (135 format) when my wife was reading to our daughter, but I want to take a better shot when she knows I am taking it.</p>

<h1><em>How do you photograph your wife?</em></h1>

<p>Very carefully! You noticed, even you didn't post a picture !! :)<br>

One has to be stealth like, One has to be Ninja like or one gets the eye of death!</p>

<p>~Jack</p>

 

<p>Well, I have "one" wife photograph story. Back in the 1980s when I was still doing some editorial work, I got a desparate call from and editor friend who said, we're doing a cover story for drinking tap water and the images we have don't-won't work. Can you do something by morning? So my wife got dressed up a bit and got some shots at the kitchen table with my then about 4 year old son, now 23, while drinking from a nice crystal water glass. I ran the film and dropped the black and white at about 8 am, that was the cover. And so goes the "one" and only photograph of her formally taken by me. As far as any intimate photos go, to the electric chair first.</p>

<p>I take pictures when we're doing stuff. Love them. They aren't all "art". In fact, most of them are not. <br>

If I want really to make a "photograph" (imagine that with air-quotes) of her, then it'd be the same way as with anyone else, except for getting mocked more when I screw something up. She probably won't like those pictures more than the others, though.</p>

<p>Perhaps you should take a look at Alfred Stieglitz's photos of O'Keeffe. </p>

<p> </p>

<p><em>"Perhaps you should take a look at Alfred Stieglitz's photos of O'Keeffe"</em></p>

<p>Those are called girlfriends.....</p>

<p> </p>

<p>I am thinking of something like an agreement that I will prowl with the camera for precisely 2 hours and she gets veto over everything, as usual. Some way of lulling her into forgetting what I am up to I think must be the key. Conversations at dinners or parties have turned up a few good ones. As Jack pointed out, I am, of course, forbidden to post any photos here..... My kids are interested in photography but they have done little better than me, chiefly for not having bothered. Yes, as Doug says, O'Keefe was a girl-friend and they are easier for some reason. Erwitt's photos of his first wife had cats or babies to help things along. There must be something wrong with the photographer husband as well as his wife. My searches didn't turn this up, but memory tells me that sadly the wife is most often invoked in discussion of how to justify another lens, tripod or camera; or sometimes the happy boast of the dysfunctional photographer husband that the new Leica MP will not be noticed and will be thought to be the same as the familiar beater M2 it replaced (only it didn't replace it because the M2 is still in the cupboard).</p>

<p>Okay then, a girlfriend who became his wife and he continued to photograph. Stieglitz and O'Keefe were married in 1924 and remained married until his death, albeit they lived apart at the time of his death. </p>

<p>Fortunately my wife still manages to contrive a smile and give me a nice pose once in a while (all the while wondering if this is yet another damn camera or lens being leveled at her). Ironically, one of the nicest candids I got of her was when I had my trusty old $40 Craigslist find Canon QL17 III loaded with TMax 100. I was running a roll of film through it just to give it some exercise. I had one shot to use before the roll was finished. I was walking through the living room, asked her to smile, clicked it off with the "auto" aperture setting and developed the film. Ironically, it ended up being the best shot of the roll.</p>

<p>Getting a nice shot of her like this always invites the inevitable comparison question: so if you can get a shot like that with a $40 camera, what do you need your M7 and those expensive lenses for? Those questions just sort of hang in the air for awhile ... awkwardly ...</p><div></div>

<p>Very carefully. :-)</p>

<p>Carl, you're a genius.</p>

<p>Check out the 1999 book, "The Model Wife," by Arthur Ollman (former director of the Museum of Photographic Arts, San Diego). Scholarly discussion of work by Adolph de Meyer, Alfred Stieglitz, Edward Weston, Harry Callahan, Emmet Gowin, Lee Friedlander, Masahisa Fukase, Seiichi Furuya, and Nicholas Nixon. Lots of different approaches.</p>

<p>Photographing my wife is very easy. She will readily get involved in my photographic proposals - whether a day with kids or something more staged.<br>

Trouble begins after that. She seems to be an inordinate blinker - killing 75% of shots and the shots I think are great or even just sweet she will say she doesnt like herself in them - usually for nothing quantifiably obvious.<br>

Here's a shot taken yesterday she didnt like and Ive no idea why..</p><div></div>

<p>I just take it. Then she tells me what she likes or not and work on the left overs. Normaly I try no to stage lighting and stuff. I do take my camera mostly everywhere so as mentioned some times at Starbucks, dinner, friends house, go get the idea.<br>

Taking some with the kids helps too.</p>

 

<p>This was a bit staged</p>

<p>And last was on a walk. I sae the nice wall and asked her to pose. So I guess you have to have the camera ready at all times and do it often. After a while they get used to.</p>

 

<blockquote>

<p>Photographing my wife is very easy. She will readily get involved in my photographic proposals - whether a day with kids or something more staged.<br /> Trouble begins after that. She seems to be an inordinate blinker - killing 75% of shots and the shots I think are great or even just sweet she will say she doesnt like herself in them - usually for nothing quantifiably obvious.<br /> Here's a shot taken yesterday she didnt like and Ive no idea why..</p>

</blockquote>

<p>Well, the reaction experienced by a non-trained human when seeing his/her portrait is one of rejection. That was wonderfully covered in a philosophy compendium about portraiture I read some time ago. A portrait is a way to look at yourself you NEVER experience; not even in a mirror, because of the left/right flip which gives away the wrong proportions.<br /> A portrait, being it in painting or photograph is the truliest, and at the same time the falsest representation of one's self. You can't expect them to accept it ;-)<br /> Anyway, my fiancée (don't know if we'll ever get married, but I assure we are maybe something more than husband and wife) is my lifeblood when it comes to photography. I got her introduced in the black art as well, and really enjoys both sides of the camera.<br /> My real problem is finding other models, beside her... My portraiture portfolio looks quite boring!! :-D</p>

<p>In the nude, man those early married years were great. Now after 25 years only a faint memory.</p>

<p>Good advice and good references and good pictures. Thanks.</p>

<p>Very carefully, to be sure! - And most often she does not like them..... ;)</p>

<p>I hate to bring tis up, but mixing business and peasure CAN become problematic,<br>

especially when the relationship or marriage ends,<br>

and lets face it; statistics are not exactly on Cupids side in our modern day society !<br>

I know of more than one colleague, who after breaking up with his woman<br>

deeply regretted shooting and uploading pics of what was ealier the love of his life !</p>

 

<p>Mostly "don't shoot, don't shoot" is the only reaction that I all have got, but when she is ready....<br>

<a href="http://www.photo.net/photo/5471781">http://www.photo.net/photo/5471781</a><br>

<a href="http://www.photo.net/photo/6327919">http://www.photo.net/photo/6327919</a></p>

I did a passport pic of my wife and was eventually forgiven. Thank goodness I won't have to do that again for another ten years. Now the only time I catch hell is when we go through customs.

<p>I think you need two props, a long lens and a small dog (a larger dog is likely to get in the way of your shot). I personally use a Staffordshire Terrier crossed with a Whippet and a 300mm f2.8. I make an excuse about seeing something 'over there' I am just going to have a look at and leave her with the dog and a stick. Give it five minutes and I can get some nice candid shots.</p>

<p>My partner suffers from the same shutter clicking eye closing problem that seems to afflict so many !<br>

Hope this helps,</p>

<p>Marc</p>

<p>Wife here, with 2 tips: a photographer friend once told me a secret for a relaxed smile. Tell your wife to look at the lens and then relax with her eyes closed while you count to three. On three, she'll open her eyes and smile and you'll snap the photo. That usually works very well for portraits. Second trick is to use a cable release and have her take her own photo in privacy. Putting the camera on a tripod with a mirror behind it can help get the right "look." Good luck! </p>