Civil Unions

Civil Unions have been recognized here in CT since (I believe) last October

(2005), and this week I've accepted my fist civil union booking.

 

It was a last minute booking, their photographer had to bow out due to

illness, and they were recommended to me. I had the day open, so I took the

job. I did make the effort to explain to them that it is my first civil union

booking, and they did not seem to think that a problem.

 

Photojournalistic wedding photography being what it is, most of my approach

won't change too much. I shall continue to take my lead off of the couple, and

observe their interactions, both with each other, and their assembled family

and friends, capturing moments and emotions as the day unfolds. My

only 'concern' is with the formal portraits.

 

My clients are two women. I did a quick Google search on Civil Union

Photography, and a lot of the sites I saw showed an interesting pattern. In

most of them, one bride was dressed in a traditional white wedding dress, and

the other in what I can only describe as business attire, usually a black

skirt and blazer, with a top of some sort, color coordinated of course. This

was more so the case with younger female couples, and sets up clear 'roles',

and the formal portraits followed those 'roles'.

 

The photos I saw of female couples who were not thusly attired seemed

to....for lack of a better word....flounder a bit. There was little in the

photos to suggest two people in love, as if the photographer (or his clients)

wanted to downplay the romantic aspects of the day.

 

Given that I don't have a long history with the couple, and don't know them

well, I realize that I'll have to feel out their relationship as the day goes

along. It would be a great asset to me however to hear some posing ideas, so

that I can at least have something to fall back on if inspiration fails to

deliver. So, I was wondering if anyone out there had some interesting posing

ideas to share for a civil union between two women.

The thing to remember here is not to look for a 'bride and bridegroom' and that problem goes away. I view it as a portrait session of two people who are obviously close.

 

Oddly enough most gay couples tend not to have a strong/weak thing or 'male/female' My brother is gay and his partner is about the same in terms of contribution to the relationship although my brother maybe softer in his approach to daily life.

 

Some same sex couples do play down the romatic part as they appreciate that they have guests and not all those guests may have open views. Sorry but it's true, I have some experience of it personally.

 

Go with the flow is the order of the day. Same sex couples hold hands, kiss and cuddle and that's the main part of the photographs!

They have Mums and Dads and special friends, it really is no different.

 

If they clearly want to identify a role by dressing in a traditional manner then go with that too!

Just remember that these are WOMEN, and they'll want to be posed in ways that flatter them

as women. Just because a woman wears a suit doesn't mean she doesn't want to look sexy or

beautiful (because she certainly is to her partner!).

 

Approach the formals as you would any formal portrait with two women. You have the added

benefit of their extra-close relationship to break down the barriers you might otherwise

normally face when photographing two women. Take advantage of it!

 

Good luck!

I agree with Kevin's comment to "go with the flow". I think the couple will give you some cues on what they'd like....I'd also encourage you to relax, have fun with it, and invite them to "experiment" with whatever poses that they'd like. "Every bride, (and each bride) deserves extraordinary images!"

I've done a few unions (commitment ceremonies, etc). One couple both wore white bridal gowns, the others have both worn formal dresses. In both cases, just shoot them as you would a male/female couple but as someone mentioned, being both women, pose them in flattering poses.

<BR><BR>

When it comes down to it, you'll find out that this is no different than any other shoot, just 2 people getting hitched. Granted, by nature we're all used to male/female, but once you get past that, it's a piece of cake (wedding cake). :)

<BR><BR>

Bob

"Every bride, (and each bride) deserves extraordinary images!" - David Shilling

 

This is a great statement David!

 

I have seen some galleries that had some absolutely great pictures of gay couples. Maybe try pbase, you might find some there for ideas.

As a married lesbian I feel I am qualified to answer a post like this with some inside knowledge.

 

I tend to get really upset when people ask me "who's the wife?" in my relationship or, even worse, when they assume my wife is the "husband" or "groom" in the relationship. I dealt with a LOT of that around my ceremony date, and if I could go back in time there are a lot of things I would change about how we handled it.

 

Generally, though, their clothing will expose to you the answers you need. Just because someone is physically female, does not mean they care to be exposed in a feminine way. Read off of what they show you in each moment. I am smaller than my wife, but she is NOT my husband. She is my wife, and I am her's.

 

I would suggest communication with the women. Go to them and say "how do you want me to handle the photos? Do you want traditional wedding poses? Etc." They know this is your first gay ceremony and just explain to them that it is their day, and you want to make sure they love the photos.

 

I do have a photo I took at my commitment ceremony of our rings. Instead of having a small bride hand and a large groom hand, we had two hands of the same relative size, so we wanted to pose it differently... This is what we came up with...

 

http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j267/imgnepc/wedding/aIMGP1089.jpg

 

Just remember one thing, you aren't dealing with a bride's wedding. You are dealing with a COUPLE'S wedding day. You don't have a bride to focus on, it's not a "bride's day". It's a couple's day.

 

I'm a little scattered on my thoughts here, apparently, but I would love to give you more info if you have specific questions. Feel free to email me. I may be able to come up with some suggestions for you...

 

I would suggest, though, instead of "civil union photography", google "lesbian wedding photography" because, more than likely, this ceremony will be a relaxed wedding. Most, in my experience, are.

I apologize for how wordy my post ended up being... I didn't intend for that, but I had people talking to me while I was trying to type... Next time I'll have to watch myself...

Katrina, your perhaps rambling reply was the one that really made a lot of sense. I know a number of gay male couples and it's pretty much the same thing ~ not a husband and wife but two people in love. I'm really looking forward to the day when Florida legalizes same sex relationships.

 

It might be a good idea to discuss all of this with the couple beforehand. A relaxed session in a nearby park maybe a week before the ceremony would give both you and the couple a chance to see how you want to handle it.

Every bride, (and each bride) deserves extraordinary images!

 

This is a great statement David!

 

Thanks Michael, but to be honest, I've got to admit that I "borrowed" the quote from Joe Buissink :-)

"Go to them and say "how do you want me to handle the photos? Do you want traditional wedding poses? Etc." KATRINA COUCH

 

Katrina gave you the best advice you will receive on this topic. I'm going to take liberty to expound on "Etc.". Presumably the couple are comfortable with you, as they've entrusted you to record their very special day. So, you're already ahead of the game. Formal portraiture at a wedding requires the clients' input. I would approach the formals as those of two individuals, unless the two are preparing (hair, cosmetics, clothes, et al) for the wedding together. You are wise to draw your cues from the couple during the ceremony and the reception. However, when you get to formals beyond the individual and couple images of these two ladies, you will begin to encounter family dynamics that are not unique to a lesbian wedding.

 

You would do well to have the ladies appoint a liaison who will be able to wrangle family members for the group portrait. Explain to the couple-to-be that you need someone who understands the nuances of their relationship and who is comfortable with both families. If there are to be any guests of honor and/or attendees for either/both of these ladies, then one of those folks will probably be best suited to handle this responsibility.

 

Finally, whilst ducking for cover, I would offer that although you and I may be completely accepting and at ease with the situation at hand, some at the service may not be. Your job is not to enlighten or educate anyone. If you can, contact the liaison person ahead of time to coordinate the details of handling any potential personality-driven obstacles, which should be made known to you by the couple-to-be. Project confidence and enthusiasm, and above all have fun! This ceremony is meant to be a happy occasion!

 

Best of luck to you and the couple-to-be!

 

Michael J Hoffman