Bride's Hairdresser Never Showed So I Got Screwed!

<p>Ok, so I just shot my first wedding as the main photographer and here's what happened:</p>

<ul>

<li>Showed up 3 hours prior to ceremony to scope out the venue and begin the bridal getting ready shots 2 hours prior</li>

<li>Bride arrived on time but the hairdresser was a no show! </li>

<li>I took as many other shots as I could while waiting (rings, flowers, the dress, the shoes)</li>

<li>Finally a bridesmaid decided to fix the bride's hair</li>

<li>While waiting on that, I ran down to start on the groom and groomsmen but the groom was busy trying to setup a live video feed of the wedding (30 min prior to the wedding)</li>

<li>I tried to be patient and not too pushy but I'm the one losing out on portrait time</li>

<li>Finally got some shots of the groom with groomsmen but the father of bride and father of the groom decided that they wanted to be in these pictures as well (weird)</li>

<li>I didn't get any shots of the bride with her bridesmaids prior to the ceremony</li>

<li>After the ceremony, I rushed through the group shots, took a few of the bride and groom, bride with bridesmaids etc</li>

<li>The reception and send off time were not flexible so I was still making up for lost time from before the ceremony</li>

<li>Then during the reception I had to keep pulling out the couple to take shots with their families, and to take a few more of just the two of them</li>

<li>I wanted to do several fun shots with the bridal party and more romantic shots with the B and G but time did not allow. </li>

<li>I may schedule an after session to get more of just the couple together</li>

</ul>

<p>I would love to hear if other photographers have had similar circumstances and how they handled things. What can I do differently next time this happens?</p>

<p>Several times I've had brides come straight from the hairdresser only to decide that they hate the hairstyle, and insist the bridesmaids redo it. How about this one: no one shows up to unlock the chapel. Can't reach anyone with keys by phone. Had that happen a few times too. The best you can do is to try to work some extra time for emergencies into the wedding photography schedule, and think fast on your feet. Keep your cool, remain polite and friendly, and become part of the solution rather than add to the problem. Welcome to wedding photography. :)</p>

<p> </p>

<p>Tom, what you describe is typical. If it isn't the hairdresser not showing up, it will be something else. Other than working in make up shots throughout the rest of the day, not a whole lot you can do other than being organized enough to remember and do those make up shots quickly and be able to call upon your creativity under time constraints.</p>

<p>You should always educate the client beforehand, about padding the time line and the need for flexibility throughout the day, complete with examples and specific input on the actual schedule, but this kind of thing normally goes in one ear and out the other.</p>

<p>With experience, you will be able to anticipate and predict what will happen, and be able to make suggestions on the fly that may enable you to still get the images you need. In these kinds of situations, I often 'bargain' for 10 minutes here and there. Bargaining means you promise that it will only take 10 minutes and then, you only take 10 minutes. I also point out exactly what is missing, and let them decide if they want to do anything about it. It would be good to write what is missing on a piece of paper. That way, if there is any doubt later, you have something in writing.</p>

<p>I personally would not do an additional session if it wasn't my fault the schedule became messy--without being paid to do the session. Of course, if you want portfolio material, that might be another story.</p>

<blockquote>

<p>I'm the one losing out... ...I Got Screwed!</p>

</blockquote>

<p>This is the conclusion of your post but I didn't see anything mentioned of what you were entitled to and then deprived of. What was wrongly taken from you?</p>

<p> </p>

<p>@Matt, haha thanks! I figured this might be part of the territory. <br>

@Nadine, Thanks for your input and suggestions! I love the bargaining for 10 minutes idea and letting them know what we're missing. I wasn't planning to do the after session for free, but maybe at a decent discount. </p>

<p>Sometimes I wonder if photographers forget they are there to serve not be served. You can only do the best you can. I don't shoot retail, but shot some of the first ads for the Luxor Hotel in Vegas. I flew myself and my crew in and was told everything was set up, nothing was--including having power where needed or even permission from the construction supervisor--oh, and the hotel was further from being done than any of us, the ad agency or art director-thus me, were aware of. We just made it happen with models sitting around for hours waiting until I could shoot, that's why we get the big bucks--to make it happen!</p>

<p>@John, that's the way that I felt because the ceremony and reception weren't affected (much) by the hairdresser not showing up, but my time for portraits was what I lost, so my output to the client will be affected. Maybe that's a weird way of looking at it, but it feels like I got screwed out of my time to create amazing images. </p>

<p>@John A, I understand that I was there to serve but feel like my opportunity to serve to my best ability, to be creative, to give variety of shots, was greatly affected by the schedule being thrown off 1.5hrs. This was my first wedding as the main photographer so of course I'm being a little selfish and wanting to be "proud" of my work, but I don't think there's anything wrong with that. </p>

<p>John has a valid point here . . . perhaps you missed out on some print sales, but they are never a sure thing anyway. The day NOT about you as a photographer and what you need. The day is about the couple . . . well, let's be serious, it's about the bride! You are there document the day, no matter your style. This is pretty much how weddings go. There is always something. Usually it is pretty small stuff, but sometimes it is much bigger than what you describe here.<br>

The best preparation for this is to prepare the expectations of the client. Remember, in a few years you will have photographed hundreds of weddings, whereas most girls only get married three or four times in their entire lives! It should be in your contart and clearly explained to the bride during the week before the wedding, that you can only photograph subjects who are made available to you in a timely manner. There will come a point, if they just get later and later that there will be pictures that are not taken and they will not have. I don't usually pad the schedule, I generally start two hours before the ceremony. This leaves little bit of flex time, but if they are not ready two hours before, they wouldn't have been three hours before either. You can only help with the schedule, you can't make them stick to it.<br>

Let's see . . . I have stood around locked out of the chapel on several occasions . . . I have had a groom and best show 45 minutes late to the ceremony . . . Oh and that grooms parents were over an hour late . . . no flowers at the house . . . no flowers at all . . . bridesmaid dresses not delivered because noone had thought to pay for them . . . bride was in the hospital all the night before suffering from dehydration and took an IV between the ceremony and reception . . . bride's aunt trips up the steps in the church while going up to do a reading and breaks her arm . . .</p>

<p>Eh, anyone busting Tom for feeling "screwed" is missing the point. It's perfectly understandable for him to feel that way. After all, any photographer who didn't get a bit annoyed about that sort of thing (though yes it does happen a lot) probably doesn't have the passion any more to do a good job. Nothing in his posts come across as anything other than a photographer wanting the best opportunity to serve clients and produce the best work his skills allow.</p>

<p>As Nadine and Matt point out, this happens all the time. Sometimes it's one thing, sometimes it's another. It's all part of the wedding game. And to be honest, it's part of the problem you as a photographer are paid to solve. People don't need a pro photographer to make good images in perfect situations, anyone with a camera can do that. People pay a pro to get good images when Murphy's Law comes a calling, as it always does.</p>

<p>@Ed, so that's what I have to look forward to? lol. You're right, I need to remember that its their day, and if the schedule doesn't allow for more creative/fun/posed shots, they are the one's missing out. </p>

<p>@Josh, thanks for seeing my point, and bringing up some excellent ones of your own! I need to print this quote and frame it "People don't need a pro photographer to make good images in perfect situations, anyone with a camera can do that. People pay a pro to get good images when Murphy's Law comes a calling, as it always does."</p>

<p>I don't think anyone missed the point because no one was really out to 'bust on' Tom. Its obvious that his motivation was to produce good results and to serve the client well. We know annoyance and frustration arises when hurdles are placed in front of efforts to produce good results. Tom was taking it personally as a something against him, however (i.e. he got screwed, he lost out, he wanted to do certain shots), which is important to avoid in the future. Just telling someone not feel emotion is not quite effective as helping them see their emotions in another perspective. Through the use of the Socratic Method in this instance. If Tom can't answer a question of what HE lost then he is more apt to realize emotionally that it's not he who suffered the loss. That he isn't being screwed over. That will help ease the frustration that ensues when these things go on.</p>

<p>a good majority of the time someone is going to throw the schedule off, this is part of what happens with weddings, many times it is the bride who is running late... or the flower people, or someone else that should be doing something related to the wedding, as you keep doing weddings, you will learn this happens a lot. I encourage brides to give people earlier times to have more of a "time cushion" built in to allow for people to not be on time because then if they are "late" they are not as late as they would have been if they had been given a later time.</p>

<p>"I tried to be patient and not too pushy but I'm the one losing out on portrait time". </p>

<p>Well, this sort of reads like maybe the problem was starting to roll over into the performance and interaction with the people. And to be honest, I was sort of busting on Tom a bit as it isn't just about passion, it is about who you are serving as I said. As a pro, you have to flow with things and quite honestly, get a sense of humor about it. I understand that as a first wedding you want to do it right and show what you are capable of, but that is just the point, if you get lost in being upset, then you aren't going to perform well at all. So certainly it can be annoying, but you have to let it go and don't become another drag on the party, you need to be a positive force and make the best of it.</p>

<p>Take whatever you learned from this and put it in your toolbox, then carry on. You didn't get screwed, the bride did, you feel like you did. Stuff like this will happen again, as already mentioned, and worse. Here's a few you can look forward to: Blizzard, heavy flash flooding, bride vomiting from nerves entire wedding, you get a flat tire in middle of wedding (Any guess where all the photo equipment is?), whole family fighting at brides house throwing small table through window upon arrival for dressing, limo drops trans-you're now bringing B&G to wedding reception in your Toyota, limo crashes -you're doing first aid to groom with bloody nose, total power outage for entire reception (talk about nightmare).... OK, you get the point, there's nothing to worry about. </p>

<p>any amateur can take good pictures when everything is going well... but it is those who can take good pictures when hell breaks loose that sets them apart from the rest.</p>

 

<p>Se La Vie! I've been a part of dozens of weddings, more often as a stylist than as a photographer, and I've never seen one where something didn't fall out of place (other than one $300,000.00 wedding with a team of professionals behind every step of the process!)</p>

<p>I find it helps to have everyone's expectations clearly defined before hand. You don't have to seem "pushy" but at times you have to make executive decisions to make the most of what you and the couple expect to have for photos. (The last wedding I shot the B/G were haphazardly trying to get groups together for portraits, my role was to guide them towards the most efficient way to get the shots we wanted.)</p>

<p>You may be surprised at what the couple like out of the shots you did get, I usually am! I kindly offer that if their expectations were for magazine worthy photos, they would have contracted both an ironclad reliable stylist (costly) as well as a makeup artist (more cost) and a more experienced wedding photographer (also more cost)!</p>

<p>Also, if you charged any less than market rate in your area for shooting the wedding, I would recommend that if you re-shoot the b/g at a later date you should do it for the same rate you would charge for a portrait session. You are a professional and your time is valuable. (I don't recommend telling the couple about the shots you had in mind and missed, they will never cross their minds, save those inspirations for your next client.)</p>

<p>If the Bride and Groom are happy with the photos, you were successful, even if you didn't get anything to showcase your talent in your portfolio!</p>

<p>Plan for the worst and hope for the best! Good luck!</p>

<p> </p>

<p>Welcome to the bizarre world of wedding photography. </p>

<p>Great points everyone, and thanks for making me realize that this is just a part of the job that I better get used to. Just knowing that will help immensely for future weddings. </p>

<p>When the schedule gets messed up it's my experience that it's the photography time that gets cut. The officiator and ceremony location management aren't going to alter their schedule. The caterers and reception location management aren't going to alter their schedule. The cut is going to happen to the photographer. I discuss this ahead of time with the B & G, and explain that to do my best work I need a certain amount of time. If they and/or their family, friends, and other vendors are prone to be late we should adjust the schedule accordingly. </p>

<p>Another thing I run into more often than I would've imagined: limos and party buses overheating. Dozens of times I've been stranded somewhere with the B & G and wedding party waiting on a new limo or bus to arrive. </p>

<blockquote>

<p>John A. stated: <strong>"get a sense of humor about it"</strong></p>

</blockquote>

<p>Whatever the wedding day dishes out, <strong>record it</strong>.<br /> I ALWAYS mention to the bride:<em> </em><br /> <em>"In all of the weddings I covered, not one has ever been perfect; </em><br /> <em>so enjoy the day because it will fly right by".</em></p>

<p>Besides, many times <strong>the inevitable faux pas</strong>, years later, makes for the most memorable part of the wedding day. i.e.:</p>

<ul>

<li><strong>If you're locked out of the church;</strong> have some of the wedding party act like they're picking the lock or use a horizontal held groomsmen as a battering ram. </li>

<li><strong>The "no show" hairdresser;</strong> while the bride is looking into a mirror, have one of the bridesmaids do a quick humorous hairdo that the bride reacts as if she likes it. </li>

<li><strong>If someone falls;</strong> later in the shoot, pull the B&G or a wedding party participant aside to shoot a "horrified" reaction shot.</li>

</ul>

<p>You get the idea...</p>

<p>@Gus, that's a GREAT way to look at it. Thanks for your input!</p>

<p>I take it they didn't let you photograph them as the bride's maid was doing the bride's hair? That might have made for some good photo ops.</p>

<p>@Eduardo, no, they went into the bathroom and closed the door, which was the one place I wasn't allowed (bridesmaids changing, etc) </p>